Trying To Find The Will…..

One of the things I struggle with most… is exercise. Not gonna lie… my lifestyle has been pretty sedentary for… well ever. And I’ve never been particularly thin. Over the years my weight has fluctuated a fair bit. Through the beginning of high school I would have considered myself “chubby”. After a pregnancy, I was definitely overweight. In the years since I have more or less bounced back between the two points.

For the first time in years, I’m finally feeling like it’s really time to start doing something about it. But it’s SOO hard to get started. I bought a gym membership two weeks ago, and I’ve only managed to drag myself there a couple times (and by a couple times… I mean once). I don’t know what’s holding me back. Is it fear? Is it walking into the unknown, in front of people, and doing my thing? Is it trying to figure out what exactly what “my thing” is? I get up with the best intentions every day… but it’s so easy to make excuses.

And then I wonder… is it just me? Or does everyone struggle with this? Even those who work out regularly… and have been doing it for years. Is it still a battle to make yourself do it?

I’m tired of the battle and it hasn’t even really started. So discouraging.

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